My Thighs Touch

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Written By

Lauryn

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Expert Reviewed By

Dr. Lauryn Lax, OTD, MS

Dr. Lauryn, OTD, MS is a doctor of occupational therapy, clinical nutritionists and functional medicine expert with 25 years of clinical and personal experience in healing from complex chronic health issues and helping others do the same.

 

My Thighs Touch

My thighs touch.

 

And, you know what?

 

I am OK with that.

 

Actually, I am better than OK.

 

I embrace it.

 

Touching thighs used to be my worst nightmare.

 

Eating Disorder Trigger

Once a trigger-point for my eating disorder, my beliefs that my thighs could NOT touch started when I was 8-years-old.

 

I remember my mom making a casual comment about not liking her own thighs, and in turn, internalizing her belief as my truth for me as well.

 

I was also a dancer and cheerleader, and I remember feeling very awkward in my pink tights and black leotard, my little 2nd-grade tummy sticking out and those darned touching thighs. I compared myself to the other little girls in their tights, or on top of the stunt pyramids, and thought, if only I was smaller, than I’d be ________ (fill-in-the-blank: cuter, prettier, more well-liked, on the top of the pyramid, etc., etc.).

 

By the time I was 10, merely the thought of touching thighs sent me into an exercise binge and food-restriction-mode.

 

Mayday! Mayday! Sound the alarms!

 

As time went on, hating my thighs became a deeply-rooted belief.

 

I Hate My Thighs

The inner and outer thigh machine at the gym was a MUST everyday.

 

Squats in the shower, in the middle of the night, while blow-drying my hair.

 

Hundreds and hundreds of lunges.

 

No carbs.

 

My thighs were the “enemy”—and if I had the POWER to control the size of my thighs—the smaller, the skinnier, the more-chicken-leg-like, the better.

 

 

After all, don’t perfect women’s thighs not touch?

 

Take this model for instance.

 

Perfect Thighs?

 

Isn’t she modeling a perfect body more than a swimsuit?

 

Today, my thighs that touch represent health, life, strength, hard work, letting go.

 

Strong Inside And Out

 

Health, as in, now I am healthy.

 

 Life, now that I truly have my life back after years and years of obsessing over the size of my thighs, my waist, my jeans, my arms, and on and on.

 

Strength, that I have beautiful, muscular, strong legs to carry me through my day-to-day comings and goings. I can walk, run, jump, stretch, sit, squat, and beyond.

 

Hard-work, from the months and months of hard-work I put into nursing my body from death to life. The hard-work I endured through treatment, often times feeling awful through the process, in order to now, feel great.

 

Letting go of the “former ideals” and instead, accepting myself as my ideal.

 

 

I don’t need to be anyone else or anything else, other than ME.

 

What a NOVEL idea!

 

Be Yourself, Everyone Else Is Already Taken

 

Why be anyone else or anything else?

 

Embrace your self, your beauty, your strength—inside and out.

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